All kids have emotional ups and downs and we have heard over and over again that it is normal for your child to feel stress, worry, anxiety, and frustration during this pandemic. At some point most everyone has cried, screamed, or lost their cool since the coronavirus halted our lives back in March. So the questions arises- at what point are these emotions and behaviors more than "normal"? When should you seek professional help?

When To Seek Help

According to the National Association of School Psychologists, parents and caregivers should contact a professional if children exhibit significant changes in behavior or any of the following symptoms for more than 2 weeks.

Preschoolers—thumb sucking, bedwetting, clinging to parents, sleep disturbances, loss of appetite, fear of the dark, regression in behavior, and withdrawal.
Elementary school children—irritability, aggressiveness, clinginess, nightmares, school avoidance, poor concentration, and withdrawal from activities and friends.
Adolescents—sleeping and eating disturbances, agitation, increase in conflicts, physical complaints, delinquent behavior, and poor concentration

This Pediatric Symptom Checklist created by Massachusetts General Hospital is a quick 17 question screener that is helpful in determining if your child's behaviors are in the normal range. Click here for the English version or here for the Spanish version. When you are finished, calculate the total score by adding the 17 individual scores (0 for never,1 point for sometimes, and 2 points for often). The total score will be between 0 to 34. If the score is 15 or higher your child's difficulties are considered higher than normal and help may be needed. Please note that this tool does NOT diagnose any specific condition. PSC scores simply show how many problems are reported and whether those scores are high compared to other children. A higher PSC score often suggests a problem that can be helped, though it does not necessarily mean that your child has a disorder.

Where To Get Help

There are many resources to help you and your child when emotional difficulties rise. Your child's family doctor or pediatrician is a good first stop. They are experts at differentiating between normal and abnormal levels of emotional distress. They can also assist with referring to a counselor. You can also call The National Mental Health Information Center at 1-800-789-2647 to ask questions and receive information and brochures and therapist referrals.

In a crisis- try any of these helplines:

Call 911
Disaster Distress Helpline: 1-800-985-5990 (press 2 for Spanish), or text TalkWithUs for English or Hablanos for Spanish to 66746. Spanish speakers from Puerto Rico can text Hablanos to 1-787-339-2663.
National Suicide Prevention Lifelineexternal icon: 1-800-273-TALK (8255) for English, 1-888-628-9454 for Spanish, or Lifeline Crisis Chatexternal icon

Finally, Remember: Some Struggles Are Normal

“Some moodiness, anxiety, and social and school difficulties are expected as kids grow up,” says psychologist Kristen Eastman, PsyD. “I call them bumps in the road.” These normal developmental challenges may require your child to change perspectives or learn new skills. They can be viewed as opportunities for growth. In most cases, if you offer support, your child can figure it out. Validate your child's feelings and help them problem solve. Sometimes, all the kid wants is to fee heard and understood. In the event that normal difficulties turn into something more serious, trust your gut. Don't be afraid to simply ask your child, "Does this feel like something we need to get help with?" You may be surprised to hear them say yes.

As always, feel free to reach out to your child's School Counselor if you ever have a question or concern.

Article resources:

https://health.clevelandclinic.org/11-signs-your-child-may-need-a-therapist/

https://www.nasponline.org/resources-and-publications/resources-and-podcasts/school-climate-safety-and-crisis/health-crisis-resources/helping-children-cope-with-changes-resulting-from-covid-19

https://www.massgeneral.org/psychiatry/treatments-and-services/pediatric-symptom-checklist/